There’s a trend at the minute and unfortunately, it does not support other mums. Instead, it is getting increasingly common to share ‘informative’ articles concerned with the mental well-being of our children (in particular young, pre-school children). Advising us how we should speak to our kids, discipline them, feed them, put them to bed, wake them up. The list is endless; however they all have this underlying judgmental theme which generally goes: ‘if you don’t do it this way, you will scar your child for life’.
WHAT!?!?! Don’t give uncertified advice out! What’s wrong with us! We should be sticking together – doing all we can to support other mums who need it. But instead we try to have one up on each other.
I came across one such article this morning. Written by a blogger – who note, was NOT a psychologist! It was titled something like ‘How our silent actions affect our kids’ and was essentially about how as mothers, we need to not only be aware of our conscious actions but apparently now we should be conscious of our subconscious actions because we are actively harming our kids. WHAT!?!?
Stop sharing passive-aggressive posts
These passive-aggressive posts written by any old random and shared by thousands are dangerous. The woman who wrote this doesn’t have any qualifications in childhood psychology; she’s literally Mrs. Nesbitt from across the road who has a point to make! As if we don’t suffer from enough mothers’ guilt simply going about our day-to-day life. Now my subconscious actions (FYI I don’t know what they are – because they’re SUBCONSCIOUS) are ruining my children’s life!
People really need to stop sharing these now. They don’t help! All they do is create feelings of guilt, reinforce issues of low self-esteem and create something else for us all to worry about!
I fully understand the importance of mental well-being but this incessant preaching only adds unnecessary pressure. Mental health issues are so prevalent in all of our lives today and therefore, shouldn’t we be doing everything we can to raise confident, well-adjusted children who are ready to face the challenges life (ALWAYS) throws at us as adults?
Support – don’t ostracise
Perhaps instead of living by the judgy words of strangers we should turn outwards to our friends, families and communities and support each other – with a lot less passive aggression than old Mrs Nesbitt there!
If you’re a new mum with a newborn, don’t miss my posts on newborn essentials and the realistic expectations for every new mum.